Dear Daughter #2 - Anxiety, Social Pressures and a man that lavishes you with gifts, not time, is not the man you need.
You will have a hard time, what's the real “Big Dick energy? and sidestep broken promises.
Dear daughter,
I wanted to talk to you about beauty standards but I thought “how typical of me”. I will not ‘mansplain anything to you and undermine your ability to assess the world and think critically… what I will tell you is that, as a woman who is able to ‘think’ critically and/or be independent from the masses, you will have a hard time. People will dislike you because you are not willing to become who they want you to be and with that realisation, you will realise everyone is madddd. I also scream that social norms are not normal to me, I don’t enjoy playing the expectation games but I hope your mother will be able to balance this out better for me. She will do and fill in the gaps of where I can not and I guess that is what teamwork is meant to be. All I can teach you is to use everything to your benefit - with good intentions - these are the same concepts I will tell your brother(s).
Be wary of those who lavish you with gifts and compliments, it’s an attack to drop your guard and for them to get what they want to get. A rich man does not ‘respect’ money. He respects his ‘time’ and he will calculate his engagements with you based on what he can generate financially, within those moments.
“Big dick energy” is not flying you out overseas. For a wealthy man, that’s a basic, in fact, he will mark your travel costs and gifts as ‘expenses’. Splashing money on you serves a double benefit lol, you drop his corporate taxes and he gets to ….. - man I don’t even wanna say it. Refuse his gifts and ‘grand gestures’ and get to know him on a ‘one to one’ level and you will see that if he speaks about shallow things. Does he supplement your mind with deep and intellectual conversation? and if yes, does he tick all the boxes? Is he patient and kind with your needs? Does he act like a gentleman, not only to you but to everyone he meets? Or does he speak harshly to ‘workers’ or ‘servers’ and to the ‘waiters’ that he pays for their service?
If you grow to be like your mother and I chose wisely, you would be a beautiful sight indeed. You will have learnt to harness the true power of ‘feminine’ energy and that power can and will make men weak. People will want to be friends with you because you are pretty. Watch out for these people, they are only around you to increase their own status. Do not be comforted by promises, a man that makes too many promises, is a man that is weak. A real man will honour his word, for without his word he lacks integrity and a man that lacks integrity is a man I will never allow to take your hand to ‘lead’.
You’re going to ask your mother how she and I met and she will say something really sweet but the truth is, she would’ve outsmarted me lol. She would have noticed where I was weak and made it the most powerful part of me and I will submit to her because she became a type of need - in fact, I will yearn for her spiritually.
I want you to focus on your individuality, all of these worldly things don’t ‘benefit’ you. Skincare brands create dependencies in your skin. Makeup makes you see faults in your face that you never should have seen, and all the models in the videos, that comparison? Constantly?.. Will have you chasing the ‘trend’ of beauty. But, the reality is, your standard of beauty will cut through and mean more naturally.
A healthy body is a healthy mind, I found the gym at 15 and I can tell you without the gym, I would have never made it out in these streets. Workout and/or do a sport - ima be typical here - netball, athletics, and a martial art, or every morning come do Yoga with me lol. With these sports you will ‘prove’ yourself and create a new focus, to succeed. You will not just be at home watching ‘reality TV’, that is not really reality, and get some form of anxiety.
I remember reading something similar to the statement below and it changed the way I saw the world for a piece:
“The Lamborghini and Ferrari Brand do not need to advertise because the brand names are enough, and the people who can afford these super and luxurious cars do not have time to watch TV”.
And that’s a fact - well, to what I have seen - the majority of the people that I know that own luxury vehicles care far more about substance, culture and experiences. Travelling to cabins with enriched history, or arts and museums. They care about the way the real world works, literature and philosophy, not the material dreams. They care about giving back to society, not just financially but with their time and things they learnt along the way - I touch upon the entrepreneurial mind state here, take a read.
Anxiety for me? I realised it was far more about living in the future and achieving empty things, that truly don’t matter, in comparison to your present moment. Who you are right now, means everything and not what anyone else wants you to be. Be present, remain focused and create yourself. And, when you know yourself, no man can sell you dreams.
You got this lil mama, and just know, in the worst-case scenario, you will have these letters and/or the support of me.
Love dad x